Mid Life Crisis!

I think I am having a mid life crisis! Unfortunately, not the one that means I go out and buy a sports car or a motor bike, but the type where I am not sure what the hell I want to do with my life.

Life hasn't actually gone to plan over the past few years. I was going to be a hot shot solicitor, but that meant working fourteen hours a day and missing bed time stories; so I jacked that career in. I was supposed to have three kids, but nature decided that I wasn't, so I have my one and only, who is totally and utterly amazing in every way. Next, I was going to be a writer, as I can work from home and fit it in around my family, but only one article published in a year and many editors not even bothering to return emails was slightly disheartening, and the lawyer in me became slightly peeved at that! Oh and I did write a book for NaNo, but that needs editing, I just keep picking it up and putting it back down again. I mean, if no-one wants to publish my articles, they won't want my book!

Now, I am wanting to be a teacher! OK, no harm in that, but if I qualify, it would be my third, yes third profession before I reached forty! Prior to becoming a solicitor, I was a nurse in a busy A&E department. Got a bit fed up of the verbal and physical abuse, so I left and headed back to university to get a degree in Law! I didn't actually think I would ever qualify as a solicitor, but I did, eventually. Then jacked it in as it wasn't the career that I thought it would be.

We need the money, so I need a job and there is no way on this planet I want to return to the law. It is so not the career for me. I didn't enjoy it and if I were to return I am sure it would be very brief. I would probably be sacked for failing to hit target! I am so unmotivated by monetary targets, I will just fail and I have no desire to take part in the obligatory networking and marketing. My experience of working in a law firm is all "bill, bill, bill" and it has become an incredibly solitary profession. No-one has any time, work is primarily conducted by e-mail, so you rarely get to speak to another human being. Solicitors are so obsessed by targets that no-one is available to chat anymore. Nowadays, most lawyers run their lives in six minute units and have to account for and time record every single moment of the working day! No thanks!

Now where has the teaching thing come in? Well, I have recently been volunteering in my daughter's school, as a classroom helper, and considering I am not even getting paid, I totally and utterly love it and enjoy going into school three times a week to help. I really do love it. My mum is a teacher and I have consistently avoided the profession because of that very reason. Not because I didn't think I was suited, but because I was a stubborn teenager/adult who most definitely was not (I think that phrase that may have uttered from my lips was "over my dead body") going to train in the same profession as my mother!

So here I am trying to retrain yet again. How on earth young adults decide what they want to do with the rest of their lives is beyond me, I still don't know and I am thirty eight! I guess becoming a careers advisor is not for me either!

I *Heart* Hearts.

I love everything about hearts - from their curvaceous shape to what they stand for. I love that my heart conveys emotions to me. It still beats faster and does somersaults when I kiss my husband, but it is still in fear of being broken. It keeps me alive and I feel alive when I run, skip, hop and jump.

I *heart* hearts and they appear all over my home in every shape and guise and in every possible material. I have short ones, long ones, skinny ones, and fat ones - I have hearts in fabric, wood and metal and I am constantly sneaking hearts into my home all the time!

Then a thought struck me! I love hearts, and I am sure that others do too, so why don't I try to make hearts for my friends as presents? Everyone likes to receive handmade gifts don't they? I have an A Level in textiles (well, I actually got a 'N' grade, whatever that is), but I do know my way around a sewing machine, and I have a vague recollection of how to hand stitch! I said a vague recollection! So I hit the shops, bought some fabric, ribbons, buttons and stuffing, borrowed a sewing machine, which didn't work, so I borrowed another one, which did! And I cut, stuffed and sewed and a heart was born!

My hubby laughed when he saw it, but it wasn't finished. (That's what I told him anyway). So I tweaked the design, hand stitched a bit more and at last I finished. Let me know what you think... please!

The Hungry Caterpillar Cupcakes

I thought I would kick start the New Year with some cakes! Everyone loves cakes, don't they? Now I know that some of you may be trying to resist the call of those lovely, tasty, yummy little delights that is a light, fluffy cake, but hey, I don't have any willpower!

Go back now if you can't resist, but I can guarantee that they are worth it. Little people love these cupcakes. I guess they are not for everyday use, but I made them for my friends little girls birthday, and well, everyone loved them! I mean, what's not to love? Oh and the basic recipe for the cupcakes and the icing can be used for everyday cakes, or for that girlie afternoon tea. Just bake and enjoy!

The Very Hungry Caterpillar is the ingenious creation of Eric Carle, and since its publication in 1969, it has become one of the most popular young children's books the world over. Today it remains loved by both adults and children alike. The book is beautifully illustrated, and it was one of my daughter's favourite books. Although, now she is slightly too old for the story, she continues to delight in the imaginative and innovative illustrations.

This lovely book is now a favourite of my friend's daughter, and for her first birthday, we came up with the idea (and challenge) of making a very hungry caterpillar cake, using a round sponge for the face and cupcakes for the body.

I was responsible for the cupcakes and my friend designed the face. This was just a regular victoria sponge cake, (which I think was bought rather than baked), and it was covered with ready coloured, ready rolled red icing. The feet, face and antennae were cut out from ready rolled and ready coloured black icing.

Ingredients - Makes approx 12 regular cupcakes

200g self raising flour

200g unsalted butter (room temperature)

200g caster sugar

4 eggs

1 teaspoon baking powder

1 teaspoon vanilla essence

Preheat the oven to fan - 160 degrees celsius/gas mark 4. I tend to preheat my fan oven to 180 degrees celsius, as at the lower temperature my cakes came out looking a little bit anaemic, but you will know your oven and can adjust the temperature accordingly.

Line a 12 hole muffin tin with cupcake cases.

Cream the butter and sugar together in a bowl using a hand blender (my preferred weapon of choice), until pale, smooth and fluffy. This will take a few minutes.

Add the eggs and mix for a few minutes, then add the vanilla extract and mix again.

Add the baking powder to the flour and combine, then slowly sift the flour a bit at a time into the creamed mixture, mixing after each addition until all the flour has been combined

Gently spoon the mixture into the cases and place in the oven for 20 - 25 minutes.

Check the cakes are cooked by inserting a skewer into the centre, this should come out clean.

Remove from the oven and leave to cool in the tin for about 10 minutes, then remove from tin and leave to cool completely on a wire rack before icing.

The Fun Bit!

Vanilla Buttercream Icing

Makes enough to ice 15-20 regular cupcakes

Ingredients

110g unsalted butter at room temperature

60ml of semi-skimmed milk at room temperature

1 teaspoon of vanilla extract

500g icing sugar, sifted

Few drops of green food colouring

Method

Using a hand blender (my preferred choice of equipment), mix together, the butter, milk, vanilla extract and half the icing sugar until smooth. This can take several minutes. Gradually add the remainder of the icing sugar and continue to beat until the buttercream is smooth and creamy.

To add colour, start with one or two drops, beat and continue to add colouring drop by drop until you have the depth of colour you wish.

Then ice your cakes. I ice using a pallet knife, but you can pipe the icing on should you prefer.

To ice using a pallet knife, place a blob of icing into the centre of the cake and smooth to one edge, place another blob and smooth to the other side, and finally place a final blob and swirl it around. It takes practice so have patience!

And finally - enjoy! I hope you agree that the effort was worth it!